


On The Best Days Of Forever

by Oaklin



Series: Forever Everything [89]
Category: Professional Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: (except they kind of totally are at this point), Angst, Intimacy, Intimate Touches That Go Nowhere, Kayfabe Compliant, M/M, Not Boyfriends, Swearing, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships, aggressive affection, obligatory Kevin Steen warning, stealth romance, stealth shipping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-14
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2019-04-22 03:20:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14299665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oaklin/pseuds/Oaklin
Summary: There are some leftover Feelings about That Match.Sami doesn't know how to cope.





	On The Best Days Of Forever

**Author's Note:**

> Hello hello!
> 
> Fair warning, Sami is a befuddled mess here. He is a mishmash of patented Sami overdramatics all throughout this whole ordeal. Kevin, as usual, is not helping in the slightest, though in his defense, he is trying. Failing, but trying none the less. They are confused, I got confused halfway through, and you will probably be confused by the end. I thought they were going somewhere totally different than where they ended up, but no, t'was all a ruse. I swear this series has a life of it's own.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

Sami jumps, startled. He drops the mask, the coarse fabric falling from his hands, slipping through his fingers like honey and pooling on the floor beneath his feet. It lays there, still as death and bright as the heavens, it’s darkened eye holes staring lifelessly up at him from the cold concrete. He blinks back what may or may not be tears, his hands shaking like he is in the middle of his own personal earthquake.

Fighting down the slightly nauseous feeling in the pit of his stomach, Sami turns to the new occupant of the room, not bothering to feign surprise at the heavyset form standing idly in the doorway.

Sami would know that voice anywhere, after all. Not even Sami’s own distracted musings could keep him from reveling in That Voice speaking to him.

-Only us-

-Always-

(not fair)

-To us or to everyone else?-

(no)

(yes)

“I don’t know.”

Kevin wrinkles his nose, the scrunched up result looking comically adorable. He starts across the room, approaching Sami the way one would approach a particularly hysterical wild animal.

“Then why are you doing it?” Kevin asks Sami slowly, like Sami has an answer to that inquiry, or that Kevin would ever want to hear it if he did. Still, Kevin is Kevin, and he asks anyway, speaking deliberately and moving slowly across the room, warily watching like he has something to be afraid of.

-afraid of You-

**(couldn’t** hurt him)

(wouldn’t hurt  **_him)_ **

-hurt him All The Time-

(wrestling doesn’t count)

-Good thing I wasn’t talking about wrestling then-

Sami can do nothing but bitterly laugh, the sound coming out hollow and far away, like Sami’s voice is being filtered through a tube of his own isolated desires. He chokes through the awkward silence, looking down at his fallen armor, waiting as Kevin draws near. Kevin continues to move aggravatingly slowly, his pace tentative in a way that Kevin so rarely is. It irks Sami, how gentle Kevin is being. Usually, any gentleness from Kevin directed at himself is very much welcome, but this hesitant, fear-tinged uneasiness is enough to drive Sami mad. He fights down the urge to turn fully towards Kevin and throw himself at the other man.

To his own horror, Sami finds that he doesn’t know whether he wants to hug Kevin, or hit him.

“I don’t know why I do anything, anymore,” Sami mutters, Kevin finally (finally!) coming to a stop near enough to him to touch. Sami hesitates though, unsure if he should touch his beloved, what with the dark thoughts flooding him, unbidden and unwelcome.

Kevin makes the decision for Sami (as he so often does)-

-Not sure if that’s a Good Thing or a Bad Thing-

(right now?)

-ever-

-Kevin’s fingers finding purchase on Sami’s bicep, lingering for a heartbeat. Sami closes his eyes, but can’t keep his eyelids shut against the intimacy, his gaze drawn to the touch like Kevin’s skin is magnetized. Sami glances up, something heady and almost overwhelmingly sweet in the way Kevin’s dark eyes are trained on him, both of their breathing synced up and their heartbeats so loud that Sami is sure someone will come find them and complain about the racket. For now it’s just them though, Kevin stilted touch pressing a little too hard into the curve of Sami’s bicep, blunt fingernails scraping sweat-dried skin with a fervent sort of reverence, that makes Sami shudder involuntarily.

“Kevin-” Sami doesn’t know what to say to this, doesn’t know what to fill This Silence with.

Sami briefly wishes he had his mask on. Touching and Being Touched by Kevin with something  **solid** and  **_protective_ ** to hide behind is always so much  _ easier _ than-

_ (This) _

-Whatever  **this** is-

“I thought we went over this already?” Sami closes his eyes again, this time managing to keep them closed, the apprehensive, agonized terror hiding just beneath Kevin’s words making Sami feel unworthy to marvel at the touches. Kevin doesn’t remove his fingers though, the touch going feather light as he trails his finger tips slowly down Sami’s skin. The harsh sound of a ragged breath has Sami’s attention once again, pulling himself out of getting lost in the sensations, to meet Kevin’s unsteady gaze once more. Sami tries a tentative smile, simultaneously wanting nothing more than Kevin’s undivided attention for this moment and all other moments afterward, and needing Kevin to stop touching him Like This,  _ immediately. _

For Sami’s own sanity, if nothing else.

“It’s not that. Or, well,” Sami bites his lip, trying to string together some coherence in the face of Kevin’s unbridled attention (be careful what you wish for) “It is. But not your fault. I am… afraid.”

Kevin’s eyes are unreadably open, his face so full of so many different emotions that Sami can’t parse out any of the individual feelings before they are swallowed up in a big messy pool with all the others.

“Of me?”

The question is asked quietly, a determined sort of tremor in Kevin’s tone, like Kevin thinks that he already knows the answer to his inquiry, he is just in need of Sami’s confirmation.

-Do you ever get tired of disappointing him?-

(not much choice)

“A little.” Sami doesn’t hesitate (much) and Kevin holds the violent flinch back fairly well, his bottom lip jutting out as he visibly braces himself, setting his jaw and squaring his shoulders, his dark eyes never leaving Sami’s as they stand there and lie to each other, while telling the Truth.

(Do you ever get tired of being wrong?)

-Hope will never be a lie, niñito-

“Mostly of  **_Us,_ ** though, if I’m being honest. You know?”

Kevin starts at that, his tense posture slaking, his eyes searching Sami’s almost frantically before his face rearranges itself into some semblance of it’s previous befuddled vulnerability. Sami shifts his arm, apprehensively pressing his elbow into Kevin’s palm, his heart thrumming painfully against his ribcage and greedy, undeserved optimism roiling cacophonously through his soul. Kevin watches him warily for a breath that seems to last forever, before taking a step closer, drawing their bodies together with a bravado that is quite clearly false.

Sami lets him lie though, because that is what they are doing at the moment, letting each other lie, while they secret the truth away in the tiny gaps between their words, whispered promises and broken strings of fate all clawed up between them with every jagged word they speak. Kevin nods like he is agreeing to something that Sami would never ask, trailing his fingers down Sami’s forearm until they reach his wrist, stalling out for a moment, a look of consternation on Kevin’s face as they stand there in the Silence.

“Yeah,” Kevin says softly, drawing in a gusty breath, like he is bracing himself for the match of his career.

“Yeah, I know.”

**Author's Note:**

> Believe it or not, they are indeed talking about their friendship here, and not... Other Things. Even I thought that they were going a completely different direction in this one, but no. It turns out that they really are being this melodramatic over the state of their tag team/friendship/whatever they are pretending they are at this point. Messes.
> 
> Translations!
> 
> niñito- diminutive, means little boy. meant in a fondly condescending way, here.


End file.
